’ My voice was pleading to him hoping he would at least turn around by my voice and look at me. But at the same time hoping he wouldn’t, afraid of the look he would shoot at me. He turned around and his expression was flat but his body language spoke volumes of what he was really holding back. ‘But you did.’ His voice remained surprisingly calm only furthering my guilt for what I had done to him. Even when he was angry, I being the one to cause his anger, he was still trying to preserve his own feelings for mine. ‘I know and I wish I didn’t. But I can’t help how I feel about Evan. I really wanted to like you and I tried. But I just couldn’t get over him and I’m not quite sure if I ever really wanted to.’ I knew my words would hurt but I had to be honest not only to him but myself. ‘I’m not mad at you. I’m mad at myself. I knew there was something missing, that you never looked at me the way I looked at you. But I convinced myself to think nothing of it because I wanted you so bad.. And this was a bit unusual, because she was normally cuddled right against me. I took a deep breath, and started to relax. This was obviously one of the other kinds of dreams, because I never allowed Paul to fuck me up the ass. Not ever, not even once. Every time he tried to even touch me there, I pulled away.And it is not that I hate that area. Guys could squeeze my cheeks, play with them, even kiss them. I found out that a finger caressing my ass cleavage, running up and down the soft skin in between my cheeks was a major turn-on for me. However, I wanted nothing lower. I had even tried it a few times a year when masturbating, either with a finger or once the handle of my hairbrush. Nothing, nothing but “Nope, I don’t want that!”Thankfully sleep was not long in coming, and before I knew it my alarm was waking us up. We shared several kisses, then Gloria went to shower as I made us breakfast. I was eating my half of the french toast as Gloria came out, and when I finished I gave her.
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